Fucking with Fundamentalists


I remember asking before why hardcore fundamentalists like Ted Haggard often turn out to be into drugs and extramarital sex, and I believe it was Amy who said that evangelism was itself an addiction of sorts, so it’s no wonder people who are really into it have addictive personalities in general.

Holy crap, he’s creepy. This guy might as well have had “don’t trust me” tattooed on his forehead.
I’m sure that’s true. I also think, however, that by presenting sex (and drugs, I guess, but I’m focusing on the sex in this post) as something forbidden, they place a much greater importance on it than people who have a more casual attitude. I get the impression that these are often the people who think losing their virginity is a rite of passage. I’m reminded of the Rolling Stone article on Katy Perry that I wrote about in this post, which mentioned how she kept her underwear from the first time she had sex.

Well, hey, if you consider sex to be a religious ritual, it’s no wonder you’d save a relic.


Along with this attitude toward sex is a freakish obsession with virginity. This idea can be found in many cultures, sometimes being taken to such extremes that women who have been raped are considered unfit for marriage. This seems to result from a combination of bizarre ideas about purity and a sense of possessiveness on the part of the men. Ultimately, it’s not only incredibly disturbing, but dehumanizing as well. Why place so much value on virginity? Admittedly, neither Beth nor I had been with anyone before we started dating, and I liked that we were on the same page in that respect. I don’t think that’s quite the same, though. I’m not trying to argue that sex should be meaningless. As humans (indeed, as animals), we’re hard-wired to consider it meaningful, and to think about it frequently. What I’m trying to get at is that placing such extreme spiritual value on someone’s sex life is itself a form of perversion. As such, I offer up a new term (well, at least I HOPE it’s new) for this kind of person: “pure-verts.”

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2 Responses to Fucking with Fundamentalists

  1. vilajunkie says:

    There are even fake hymens now, probably used to fool pure-verted husbands on the wedding night into thinking their wives are virgins. When of course the hymen can break for any reason at all–even having an accident, doing the splits, or riding a bike/horse/etc. Biologically, being “unvirginated”* from breaking the hymen isn’t much different than having a deviated septum from breaking your nose.

    *Firefox’s spellchecker suggested “ungerminated”, which is hilariously appropriate as virginal women are technically ungerminated. ;)

    • Nathan says:

      I’ve heard of women sewing their hymens back together, also. Because the wedding night just isn’t as romantic without the woman bleeding all over!

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